When Words Change, So Does the Work

By Gretchen Boger-O’Bryan

As a lifelong writer and former journalist, there is little truer to me than the notion that language shapes how we see the world.

During the training classes I took before becoming an adoptive parent 20 years ago, I learned just how much words matter. They shape not only how the world sees adoption, but how a child understands their own story. Saying a child was placed for adoption rather than given up honors the birth parent’s difficult, loving decision instead of defining it as surrender, and weighed down in unworthiness.

Of course, the same goes for child welfare: language can shape lives. The words used to describe families who open their homes to children in foster care have evolved over time, reflecting shifts in values, laws, and understanding. In recent years, “foster parent” and “foster family” have been replaced by “resource parent” and “resource family.” At first glance, it might seem like a simple change in vocabulary, but the difference runs deeper: It signals a broader rethinking of what it means to care for children and partner with their birth families.

Short History

The concept of fostering a child dates back to the 19th century, when children were “placed out” of orphanages into private homes. The term “foster parent” became common in the mid-1900s as state systems formalized temporary care for children removed from unsafe situations. For decades, foster parents were viewed as substitute caretakers until a permanent arrangement — usually reunification or adoption — could be made.

By the 1980s, that view began to shift. New training programs such as MAPP (Model Approach to Partnerships in Parenting) emphasized teamwork between foster parents, caseworkers, and birth families. The phrase “resource parent” quietly entered professional use to reflect this partnership – yes, decades ago – but it didn’t catch on widely.

During the 1990s and early 2000s, child welfare reform focused on permanency, and ensuring children didn’t linger in temporary care. States began streamlining approval processes so one family could both foster and adopt, and this blurred the line between “foster” and “adoptive.” This gray area provided a small boost to the use of “resource family” as an inclusive label for any family caring for a child in the system, despite the legal permanency goal.

The shift accelerated in 2013 after California’s Resource Family Approval law passed, which officially replaced “foster parent” with “resource parent.” Other states, including Oregon and Tennessee, followed. Here in the Garden State, my research shows it was 2006 when the administrative court rules switched from “foster” to “resource.” Since then, it’s been continued as laws and practices evolve, being further codified and entrenched in daily practice. Public printed materials now use the term “resource” across the board.

Indeed, the use of resource-based language reflects modern best practice, even if “foster” remains more familiar to the public.

Why Change?

The move from “foster” parent to “resource” parent isn’t about political correctness. It’s actually about accuracy, inclusivity, and respect. Let me break it down a bit:

1. Multiple roles are reflected. A “resource” parent might be fostering a child temporarily, caring for a relative’s child, providing respite care, or preparing to adopt. The word “resource” encompasses all of these possibilities and with a positivity that is meant to acknowledge that these caregivers provide stability and support in many forms, not just temporary shelter.

2. Partnership is emphasized. “Resource” parent redefines the caregiver as part of a collaborative team. Rather than standing apart from the child’s biological family, resource parents are viewed as resources for that family, helping children heal and maintain connections while parents work toward reunification. This language shift mirrors the child welfare system’s focus on supporting families, not replacing them.

3. Stigma, be gone. The term “foster” has sometimes carried negative associations, especially among youth who feel labeled as “foster kids.” “Resource family” feels less institutional and more affirming and signals that the family is a resource for safety, love, and growth.

4. Alignment with permanency goals. Modern child welfare practice prioritizes family-based care over group settings. Using “resource family” underscores that the system’s true goal is stability and belonging, whether through reunification, guardianship, or adoption.

Wording Matters

Words have great power to change perception, and it’s perception that affects recruitment, retention, and respect.

For caregivers, being called a “resource parent” can validate their contribution as an essential partner in a child’s journey, not a stopgap solution. For children, it can ease the sense of otherness that “foster care” can sometimes create. For the public, it reframes the act of caregiving from a charitable duty to a shared community responsibility.

Words we use also influence how systems operate. When states merged their foster and adoptive approval processes under the umbrella of “resource families,” they simplified red tape and allowed children to move into permanent homes more quickly. In this case, language literally helped reform policy.

To be fair, not everyone has embraced the new terminology. Some longtime foster parents feel “resource parent” sounds bureaucratic or cold, while others argue it’s more inclusive and empowering. The point, ultimately, is to redefine caregiving as partnership and permanency, not replacement.

Bigger Picture

Changing “foster parent” to “resource parent” won’t fix every challenge in child welfare. Still, it reflects an important cultural shift from seeing children as cases to seeing them as people with families, histories, and futures; and from viewing caregivers as temporary helpers to recognizing them as lifelong resources.

Language evolves because understanding evolves. As child welfare systems continue to center on trauma-informed care, family connection, and cultural respect, the words used will likely keep changing. “Resource parent” may never fully replace “foster parent” in everyday speech, but taking the time to understand the change helps reshape how we think about what family means and who gets to be part of one.

GBO is Content Director at Child Focus, and has worked with the CASA program since 2013. Prior to working in the nonprofit sector, she worked in legal journalism as a writer, editor, and managing editor, and a blogger and columnist on open-adoption parenting. Both her husband and daughter were adopted, and the trio has recently become a resource family.